Deep breaths

I can't imagine that any of you don't know, but on the off chance that you don't, I left my ex-husband almost 5 years ago, and the divorce has been final for almost 4. Since then, Hannah has seen her dad twice. The first time was in August 2004 after the divorce was final. We went back to Missouri and Illinois (with my Mom) so that I could take a friend through the temple, and so that we could get our stuff that we left behind initially. The other time was last July (2007), when we went to Orlando for a week. Chris' dad wanted to take all of the grandkids, and all of us, to Disney World and to have us visit. He had never seen Hannah, as I was still pregnant when he and Dan moved to Orlando. So, despite the inherent awkwardness of the situation, we all spent a week-long vacation together. And it ended up being quite nice. Five years and 1500 miles make it a lot easier to get along. In fact, we're quite friendly now. And why not? We don't have anything to fight about now...

So, for the third time in 5 years, and for the first time on her own, Hannah is going to go visit her dad this summer. And she is super excited about it! She's also excited because she gets to be a "grown up" and fly on an airplane by herself. We've talked about how it will work - making it sound exciting instead of scary - and she is looking forward to it. We'll see how it really goes, when she has to walk down the corridor with the stewardess (I mean, flight attendant), and I'm still standing at the gate... But at least I'll be able to wait with her and accompany her all the way to the gate.

And it's a non-stop flight, so that's not so bad. I'll just make sure that she has plenty of little activities to do, so that she stays entertained and doesn't have time to worry. I'm hoping that I'll be allowed to help her get seated on the plane, but I'm not sure how that will work...

I think the hardest part, for me, will be worrying about her and how she is doing. She's pretty adaptive, and she can be sassy (I have no idea where she gets that...), so I know she'll be able to hold her own - but that doesn't mean I won't worry. And I know that Chris will take care of her - he's got a lot riding on this trip going well. But she's sensitive and he's not quite so...

But she'll be gone for a whole month! She doesn't always last through a sleep-over. Don't get me wrong. This is the first real break I've had in 5 years, so I will enjoy it just as much as I'll fret. I just want things to go well...

Worrying: It's what we do.

Forced response to being TAGGED...

The prompt: 3 joys, 3 fears, 3 obsessions, 3 goals, and 3 random facts

My responses:

3 Joys -
1. Holding a sleeping or cooing baby
2. The smell when it rains
3. Lying on the couch, reading a book, window open, rainstorm outside, and a light breeze blowing through the room. Aahhhh....
4. Watching Hannah sleep. (I cheated and wrote 4!)

3 Fears -
1. That something will happen to Hannah and I'll be helpless to fix it.
2. That something will happen to me, and I'll leave Hannah to face the world alone.
3. That I will be alone.

3 Obsessions -
1. Bones (the TV show). Maybe it's just David Boreanaz...
2. So You Think You Can Dance. I can't, but I love watching to see what they do. I especially like watching the Mia Michaels, Shane Sparks, and Wade Robson routines...
3. Dr. Who - I've been converted. It's a fun show. And David Tennant makes for nice scenery.

3 Goals -
1. Finish my Bachelor's in Psychology. I'm almost half-way with my UoPhx classes. 14 to go.
2. Move back to California. Aaahhhh....
3. Travel the world with Hannah. I want her to have a global view of the world.

3 Random Facts -
1. Trinidad & Tobego is above Venezuela, not in the Mediterranean. Woops. (Forwarded that email to the wrong support center...) If I'd had a map, I would have known that. And such as...
2. www.despair.com makes me giggle.
3. Allegedly, non-filtered beer is a good source of B-vitamins.


TAG!!! You're it!

Pronunciation key

For those that are interested, this is how you pronounce Paraskavadekatriaphobia:

pair-uh-skav-uh-de-cat-tree-uh-foe-bee-uh

Hope that helps! :)

Paraskavadekatriaphobia

'Fear of Friday the 13th' Just a little piece of useless trivia for you... Learning is fun, huh! Did I mention that I like words?

To clarify, I am not afraid of Friday the 13th. In fact, these Fridays are usually good days for me. And, especially this time, it would be tough to beat yesterday for craziness. So I'm feeling good about today...

What about you? Any good Friday the 13th stories?

A new friend

So I made a new friend today. Her name is Sheryl. Wanna hear how we met? It's a GREAT story!

So Ben forwarded me some lame email this morning with a note that says "Read this my love...!!!!" And the email WAS really lame - some drivel about financial blessings when you give your all to someone else. Figures. Then I happened to glance at the "To" field on the email. And I noticed that there was another name listed: "doingarita." At first, I thought it said "doingrita" and I was a little irritated. But I was still irked that he called me AND another person "my love." So I emailed her.

Turns out "Rita" is really named Sheryl. She's 45, lives in Montana, and has been planning her marriage to Ben which was supposed to happen in the next few months, with a temple sealing in January. Awesome. Congrats! (this must be uttered with sarcastic enthusiasm.) I think Ben will be a little surprised when Sheryl tells him the wedding is off. Particularly when she mentions her new friend, Melissa, that lives in Utah. I only wish I could see his face.

Sheryl and I proceeded to chat for the next couple of hours. We became fast friends. :) We even discussed flying to Africa. I offered to hold him down while she kicks him, then we could trade off. But our plans are on hold, as neither of us owns a current passport. Alas.

In the meantime, I think Sheryl is really happy that I emailed her. I can't believe I did - that was a little bold, even for me. I've already reported Ben on the website, and Sheryl is doing the same. I'm considering setting up a profile just to warn women about him... I just wish I could do more.

Sheryl and I decided not to say anything for a week. We want to come up with a really clever way to reveal that we know about each other. You women are witty and clever... Any great ideas? I'll pick a winner by next Wednesday.

Long time, no blog...

I know. I have exhibited epic failure on how to maintain a regular blog. And I forgive you if you gave up even checking... But I am actually alive.

I just finished another class - the one with my awesome hippie teacher! Marty rocks!!! :) Now I get to tackle statistics. The official class title is "Statistical Reasoning in Psychology." Should be horrible. I mean, exciting... Actually, I'm not sure what to expect, so I'm trying to think happy thoughts. I'm just hoping I don't have a paper due each week in this class. The last one was brutal! Good stuff, but brutal.

Now, to bite the bullet. I know a few of you are wondering about Ben... So far as I can tell, he's nothing but a big fat liar - in fact, I don't think those pictures are really of him. I have no idea who they are, but I don't think they are the guy I've spoken with. He's probably out just to scam vulnerable, single American women. And I am over it! I'd be happy to be proven wrong, but I don't think I will be. Maybe the guy in the pictures is alive and single...? He's a QT!

My heart says to forget guys for another 5 years and then see how things go. But I'm not going to give up again. Because I can't possibly find Mr. Right if I don't even look. And he can't find me if I run away and hole up like a depressed hermit... So I'm going to just suck it up, chalk another one up to experience and move on. Let's hope for someone cute and close by that I can have fun with.

Jen - Do you think there's any chance that Downtown would actually consider "fishing off the company pier?" And would he actually ask me? I think a date with JB would be fun! (For everyone else, JB is a guy I work with. "Downtown" is his nickname... Everyone has one. Mine is MJ.)

PS - If anyone else has any great guys that would be cool with a big girl, I think I'd be open to getting set up...

In the meantime, life goes on. Work - School - Home - Hannah - and everything in between.

Wow...

Need I say more?